ASHBY VILLAGE CHECKS IN
By Karin Evans
As the shelter-in-place mandate went into effect, Ashby Village staffers quickly switched gears to figure out creative ways to support members confined at home who might need some help or just some company.
Operations Director Pat Carvalho mustered a group of volunteers who began reaching out by telephone, starting with members who were 90 years old and up, then working their way down through the 80- and 70-year-olds, and eventually to every member.
Joanne Carder, a member who’d volunteered over the years in other capacities—from being a Med Pal to working with the Arts and Culture committee and Elder Action—thought the idea of making phone calls sounded like a good way to connect with people under these unprecedented conditions. Given a list of 16 people to call, she began asking how each person was doing and whether he or she needed help with anything—grocery shopping, getting to the doctor, a prescription picked up. One woman said she had a hard time standing in the grocery store line, so Joanne put her in touch with someone who could help.
Once any needs had been identified, Joanne found the conversations easily morphed into mutually rewarding chats. “We would just connect,” she says. “It’s amazing how you can go from asking questions, and then the conversation flows into many other things. One woman and I ended up talking for a long time about our sons. “
Another member Joanne reached, a woman with heart problems who had had to postpone surgery, was nonetheless feeling quite positive. “I’m going to get through this,” she told Joanne, and went on to describe how her neighbors were singing opera to each other at night across a courtyard. Although she didn’t need any help at the moment, she said, “I know if I really need anything, Ashby Village will help me.”
“It’s amazing how many people said that,” says Joanne. “In call after call, people felt that Ashby Village was their safety net, their insurance policy, if they lost touch or needed anything.” By the third week in April, Joanne had made a series of three calls to the people on her list, and had had some great conversations.
So had caller Gordon Seligson. Having volunteered with "Hearts & Hands" over the years—washing windows, cleaning up gardens, and helping members in other ways—Gordon, too, got on the phone. “One person I called knew one of the teachers at the school where I volunteered, so we talked about that,” he says. “With another person, we found a common interest, so that was sort of fun. Most people appreciate the contact and seem to be taking things in stride,” Gordon says. “I tell them I am doing a friendly uplifting call.” One woman, he noted, said, “You are the fourth person from Ashby Village I’ve heard from today.”
Barbara Freeman joined Ashby Village when it was still just an idea. Now, more than ten years later, she is another of the Covid-19 callers. “I’ve found it really, really rewarding for a couple of reasons,” she says. “First, people are so appreciative of a call, you can hear it in their voices. They are really happy to hear someone reaching out and asking how they are. The first week was really inspirational. A genuine and just completely spontaneous contact was made, and in a few cases the quick conversation developed into a long 20- or 30- minute conversation about how we were both doing and what was going on. That was really quite wonderful.
“I like the phone,” she adds, “and I think it’s underused.”
When volunteer Mimi Wolff put in a call to member Joyce Wong, Joyce said she was doing fine so far, but was glad to know that Ashby Village was there if she needed it. “I’m kind of introverted and used to making do,” she said. “My son comes down from Santa Rosa and I have family to check on me, so I am well taken care of. I haven’t needed anything yet and wanted to save my space for really needy people, because I was getting by. But Mimi reminded me that a lot of help is available.”
Kate Sosin, Ashby Village’s Administrative Assistant, routinely answers calls from members, taking requests and arranging for volunteer help as part of her job. Now, of course, she’s working from home rather than in the Ashby Village office. “This has entailed many changes so we could keep Ashby Village running and continue to serve our members and utilize our volunteers,” says Kate. “We are still posting requests and, given the limitations, we are doing amazingly well. We have wonderful volunteers who are shopping for our members and delivering their groceries without breaking the social distancing requirements. As part of my routine now, I place a call to a large group of our members who are in their 90s weekly, as well as another handful of members every other week, inquiring if people need anything.
“Calling the same people consistently each week is a wonderful gift to me,” says Kate. “And I get nothing but positive feedback so it’s a win-win situation. I feel like we have become friends if we weren’t already, and I have gotten to know people so much better. “
In fact, adds Kate, “It feels like people are more relaxed about sharing since we all have a common enemy, so to speak, and that is not just staying healthy, but also combating isolation, depression, anxiety and loneliness. These calls work both ways to help with all of these issues. Members are very appreciative and want to take the time to chat. They tell me how they’re doing, how their family is doing, who is taking care of them. They share what they need from Ashby Village and tell me how impressed they are with our care. I hear this over and over again,” says Kate, “and it makes me feel very good about what we are doing. We have a lot of 90-plusers zooming along with Zoom, which I think is just amazing.
“If I were half as resilient as some of these lovely folks I get to talk with, I would be pleased,” says Kate. “I hope in some form we can carry on this new tradition when things get back to whatever normal is going to be.”
By the time you read this, some 35 Ashby Village volunteers will have made around 1,200 calls, provided many kinds of help to those who have requested it, and formed some deep friendships along the way. “I can’t think of a more opportune time for that,” says Pat Carvalho.
For more information, please contact Pat Carvalho pat.c@ashbyvillage.org